Forgiveness, Inspiration

Perfect.

July 26, 2011

Perfect: being entirely without fault or defect : flawless <a perfect diamond>

Then she told me something that her 6 year old son Will said and I realized the err of my ways. It is brilliant and I will now steal it and use it in class. Quoting Sir Will, of course.

He’s just learned the word ‘extinct’ at school. He comes in and says :

“Mom, why isn’t the word ‘perfect’ extinct since nothing is perfect?”

My point exactly, Will! Why hadn’t I said this yet? ( Because often 6 year olds are smarter, more observant and more honest.)

He made this deduction himself after the constant reminder from his mom that no one is perfect.

As I often say in class: Perfect people are boring people.

I even said it on Good Morning America! ( Aren’t they though?)

All jokes aside, at some point I forgave myself for not being perfect. For many years, I struggled with an eating disorder and the feeling that I had to be/look perfect. This nearly killed me, in many ways. I still struggle with this in yoga class at times, I won’t lie to you. We all do. But it’s a silly notion, this extinct idea. I am committed to not being perfect. Conforming absolutely? Who wants that? Excellent beyond improvement? Blergh.

To be clear, we are perfect. Perfectly imperfect. I can’t hear well. That’s ok. My nephew has Prader Willi Syndrome and Autism and he is perfect as he is.

It’s this idea of perfection as something outside of ourselves. As something better than ourselves. As something someone else has decided. The idea of perfect as something unattainable.

I believe it is most certainly inside each and every one of us already. But let’s unite and give up this notion that it isn’t.

A child’s laugh is perfect. A sunset blue and purple as a bruise is perfect. A good cup of coffee can damn well be perfect.

Check out this poster one of my dearest friends Karen Salmansohn made. (Yes, the unstoppable bestselling author)

In the comment section below please answer: Where in your own life can you stop trying to be perfect?

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  • Reply Jim (We Be Cool) Wiebe July 26, 2011 at 11:30 pm

    I’m just sooo happy to be alive, to encourage someone to enjoy their life, to love themself, to love others and never wait to do something they want to do in their life. No one knows when life will no longer exist as we now know it. You could break a hip, a bone or worse. Live life TODAY!!!

    It’s totally OK to not be perfect. Just don’t be stagnet. I LOVE YOU ALL…………………….

  • Reply Barrie December 19, 2011 at 8:33 am

    My perspective is a bit different yet exactly the same!!!
    We are each of us the most Perfect US that we can be!! My weirdness, silliness, uniqueness is my ME-ness! And yours is YOURS!!
    The concept of some pre-conceived mold of perfection to attempt to attain is truly folly. Thanks for the reminder!!

  • Reply ShreeWoman December 19, 2011 at 10:02 am

    Here’s where I can stop trying to be perfect: I agonizing over every single decision big or small. Sometimes I consult the runes on whether I should go to yoga class. Writing this down I feel insane. I’d like to turn to my inner guidance system more, perhaps an intention for the new year? I’ll throw some chicken bones and let you know what I decide 😉

  • Reply Lisbeth Prifogle December 19, 2011 at 11:40 am

    I LOVE this post! Simply love love love it!

  • Reply barbarapotter December 19, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    I love myself today.

  • Reply ManifestYogaJen April 25, 2012 at 11:36 am

    Reblogged this on Manifestation Station and commented:

    Add your comment below. Where can you stop trying to be perfect in your own life?

  • Reply jeanne April 25, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    I’ve stopped trying to be the perfect employee, the perfect mom, the perfect partner, the perfect friend. Striving to be perfect seems to be defined as perfect to someone else’s standard and I’ve realized that is impossible to meet – ever.

  • Reply jamesvincentknowles April 25, 2012 at 12:16 pm

    Was reading this when you posted. Somehow it seemed to almost perfectly describe you, Jennifer:

    “They are sensitive for others as well as for themselves, they are considerate without being fussy, their pluck is not swankiness but the power to endure, and they can take joke.” ~ E.M Forster

  • Reply mespresso April 25, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    I wish I could get my employer and co-workers to face this reality. There seem to be only 2 of us who understand the concept. And hmmm, we both practice yoga. Go figure.

  • Reply Jill April 25, 2012 at 2:15 pm

    With regard to perfection it is a nice goal, but always accept whatever turns out by remembering we are neither better nor worse than anyone else. I tell myself that everyday and also that I utterly accept myself, as is.

  • Reply tiawellness April 25, 2012 at 3:36 pm

    I think I can try to stop being perfect in my everyday life, whether it is at school, when I am cooking or with my husband. I tend to look at perfection as acceptance and love when I already have that, but will somehow lose it or be abandoned and alone. It definitely pervades my everyday life, so just going to try rip the band-aids of perfection one strip at a time 🙂

  • Reply Cath Kenny April 25, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    Being good enough is just that: good enough!
    Next time you catch yourself self-criticising, or over-checking to improve something to make it ‘perfect’, Just say I’ve done enough, it’s good enough! End of!
    And when it is done, you will know it is actually perfect!

  • Reply Robin April 26, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    I like to think that there is a distinction between perfect and flawless. To be able to let go of the (unachievable) belief that we should be flawless is to actually be open to see perfection in everything. For myself, I’m working at releasing the safety blanket of flawless, whether at work, looking in the mirror, or just my day-to-day actions, and instead am trying to focus on action – to try my best, to take care of myself, to be present – rather than just an outcome.

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