By Jen Pastiloff
I literally do not know how to not be an asshole I just own the URL www.DontBeAnAsshole.net. I think the answer is by being kind. Will you do something obscenely kind for someone today? Please let me know. In honor of my bday (it just passed so thanks for the wishes!) I do love you. I tricked you with the how to not be an asshole though. I am not sorry. Getting people to read things is hard. Meh.
You Are Getting A Gift in The Mail From Me, The Big Dork In The Photo.
Hi, it’s me. It’s me your favorite asshole! Or not favorite. Whatever. (Please can I be your favorite asshole?) Anyway.. I WANT TO SEND YOU A PRESENT IN THE MAIL. WELL, REALLY MY PUBLISHER WILL BECAUSE IF LEFT TO ME I WOULD NEVER MAIL BECAUSE I AM TERRIBLE AT MAILING THINGS.
What you need to do is preorder my book #onbeinghuman & then you send them proof & they will mail you a signed bookplate and a surprise present. You have until dec 31 to claim your prezzy. Go HERE (or my website home page) & details are there. Right under where it says WE GOT YOU.
You can see why I’m obsessed with my publisher Dutton Books. They are very much not assholes. Forward to any friends who might like a present because WHO DOES NOT LIKE GETTING THINGS IN THE MAIL? A weirdo-that’s who! #dontbeaweirdo #dontbeanasshole 📷 by the fab Joe Longo at my Italy retreat when I was preg & didn’t know. Whoops! 😂😂