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Inspiration, Manifestation Retreats, Travels

Had We Loved In Time.

November 24, 2012

beauty-hunting-jen-logo-blackBy Jen Pastiloff

“In which at last I saw what a child must love, I saw what love might have done had we loved in time.”Mary Oliver ‘The Visitor’

Isn’t that what I am searching for? What we all are searching for? To love in time?  Isn’t that what we are all looking for? Under all the layers of hard rock and hurt and in between the rain and the spurts of sun across Southeast Asia or Southern California or Santa Fe? Just past the temples, past the shore, past the man washing his chicken in a dirty creek as he gets it ready for the fight. Isn’t this the great journey, this pilgrimage to love, to not running out of time, to dying with a heart empty of misgivings and misunderstandings rather than a heart full of I am sorries and I wish I did it better?

Here I am in Bali. My Manifestation Retreat in Ubud has ended. A sold-out retreat with all women (minus my husband who gave us the room to create the sisterhood we needed.) The retreat was very much a retreat toward love. One of the definitions of retreat according to the dictionary is: an act or process of withdrawing especially from what is difficult, dangerous, or disagreeable. And that is just what we did. We withdrew from the comparisons and the judgements and the traffic and the old beliefs and the children and the cooking and the phone calls and the heartache and the sameness of daily life. We withdrew towards our center.

Our mantra: May I always be this happy, May I always be this free. At least for this moment. And then this one. And this one. All of it in moments.

Moments experienced with a presence that could be likened to an offering. Here: Here I am, offering you my undivided attention and acceptance. This is my offering. There is nothing in my way. There is no past, no sickness, no going back to work, no dreading the plane ride back, no discomfort. There is just this. This perfect morsel in time. And I am here. Fully. This past week we retreated towards our center and as the sun rose in the morning and we looked out towards the temple and the men in the fields and the ducks waddling all along in a row like a cliche, our hearts knew what they have known all along: That this is what love feels like. This is what it is all for.

To know a beauty so precise that it aches in the place where pain has lived and also heartache, loss. This ache is more of a returning, a piece of ourselves we thought we may have lost along the way is slid back into itself without any kind of hassle or confusion. An offering. The term achingly beautiful finally and rightfully understood. And yes, it is felt in the same place. The heart doesn’t know any different, it just knows to feel. If we let it.

This past week was a letting. Take this offering and feel it. Tie yourself in knots and the undoing is a retreat, a coming home.

We all want to love in time. To think we could possibly run out of time is what causes traffic and wars and broken hearts. The actual running out of time is less common but it does happen. We can die without fully loving the things right in front of us and inside of us. We can let that happen. When I asked what everyone was manifesting many of the women said vulnerablity. It came up a lot during the week in journaling and class themes and throughout our visits to the temple. My heart should be this vulnerable, this open, so I may feel this beauty inside of me as I feel my own breath breaking the air above me as I snorkel with the most colorful fish I have ever seen and may I know this beauty in the way I have known other facts about myself, like I am this or I am that. This beauty is the knowable part of me just as any other. But to feel this beauty, to really see it as it is means I must be vulnerable to the pain as well.

Here is the sunrise with the knowing that the sun will indeed set, the sky will open at some point today and the rain will come down without explanation, the flowers will die, but that to miss it while it is right there in front of us means we are not accepting the offering. We are not accepting what has been inside of us all along, no matter how dormant or inactive. In Bali, they give offerings to the gods three times a day. It is their daily ritual to give back what the gods have given them. They do not take this lightly, it is a duty and an honor at the same time. Why should we not have the same system? I will take the love offered to me. I will take this gorgeous spicy food and the flowers left on beds and towels and the lily pads and the terraced rice fields and the silent Thank You from the toothless woman washing her clothes in the stream and the not so silent Thank You from the thunder. I will take the I love you as fact and the I believe in you as a Go signal. I will then offer back my heart since it is mine to give away. I will offer my support and my mistakes and what I have seen here and what I know to be possible and the smiles the Balinese wear which you might think to be myth and which I can assure you is not. I will offer back my words and my imagination and describe to you in the best detail I can just what I saw and how in the healing waters at Tirta Empul I prayed for my nephew and my dead father, and how my friend, just before she ducked her head under a spigot said And this one is for me and how I held her back as her shoulders shook under her sarong, under her sobbing. I will offer them all to you without holding back at all so you believe me when I tell you that there is time.

You will believe me when I tell you that if you let yourself be the beauty and never stop seeing the beauty, no matter if you are in Bali or traffic or a yoga class, that you will never run out of time. That although your father will still have died and you cannot take back what you said, that although you will still have had your heart broken or gotten hurt, the offering is this: You. You are the offering.

We are the offering.

We must place the beauty in our hearts right there next to loss and pain and whatever else is we have in there and we must pass it on. We must love like the Balinese do. Shamelessly and fully without any but this might not last. With acceptance and duty and honor and grace. When Agung, our beloved driver and host brought us to his home for dinner and so his twin 11 year old daughters could do a traditional Balinese dance for us, he spoke of his son. With a huge smile he said his son was artistic. So proud he was. We then realized he was saying “autistic.” His son came out and said hello to us, and Agung hugged him close and with a pride I am not sure I have ever seen as he introduced his whole family. They all live together in the compound with his father-in-law (it was his wife’s home first, a rare thing in Balinese culture.) A lot of the girls on the retreat cried, as I did, not because it was a sad thing, but because the love that came from them, that little clan standing there in front a of a bird cage, was more perfect than anything I’d seen. With its lack of judgement and story and shame it was a divine moment in time and we all felt blessed to witness it and we all made a mental note to love more like they loved. To be happy in the way they were even though a few of them shared a bed and the son was autistic and they had never left the island of Bali. And so what? What did they know besides love? No, they aren’t perfect. But they were loving in time.

May we all love in time.

With love from Uluwatu, Bali xo jen ps, I am doing Tuscany next rather than Bali.

If you visit Bali you must see Ugung’s daughters dancing!

thank you


All of Jen Pastiloff’s events/retreats/workshops listed here.

Join Jen Pastiloff in Tuscany for her annual Manifestation Retreat. Click the sunflowers!

Join Jen Pastiloff in Tuscany for her annual Manifestation Retreat. Click the sunflowers!

Join Jen Pastiloff at a writing retreat in Mexico this May!  Jennifer Pastiloff is part of the faculty in 2015 at Other Voices Querétaro in Mexico with Gina Frangello, Emily Rapp, Stacy Berlein, and Rob Roberge. Please email Gina Frangello to be accepted at Click poster for info or to book. Space is very limited.

Join Jen Pastiloff at a writing retreat in Mexico this May!
Jennifer Pastiloff is part of the faculty in 2015 at Other Voices Querétaro in Mexico with Gina Frangello, Emily Rapp, Stacy Berlein, and Rob Roberge. Please email Gina Frangello to be accepted at Click poster for info or to book. Space is very limited.

Guest Posts

Joys of Motherhood

August 20, 2012

Joys of Motherhood.

This is a beautiful blog by my sister about my nephew Blaise. Blaise has come so far since he was diagnosed with Prader Wille Syndrome 3 years ago. Please check this blog out. It is gorgeous.

When I finally collected myself I was filled with questions.

What will my son look like?

Will he be morbidly obese?

Will he fall in love?

Will he have friends?

Will he be bullied in school?

Will he ever talk?

Will he ever play sports or swim in a pool?

Will he live on his own and go to college?

What will his life look like?

Click here to finish reading….

Q & A Series

Meet The Omies. The Manifestation Q&A Series.

April 14, 2012

Welcome to The Manifestation Q&A Series. 

I am Jennifer Pastiloff and this series is designed to introduce the world to someone I find incredible. Someone who is manifesting their dreams on a daily basis.

Today’s guest is Rick Rondeau, co-founder of one of my favorite companies ever: The Omies. I will admit that I am semi-obsessed and own 6 Omies t-shirts. 

11% of all revenue generated by the OMies goes directly to helping families dealing with the daily challenge of autism via, a non-profit organization created by Rick & Dahlia Rondeau.

Rick & Dahlia have 3 beautiful children, two of which have been diagnosed with autism. They say that until you experience the isolation and stress of autism, it’s difficult to understand just how challenging it can be for families. They understand and want to help. Having a nephew who has autism I love this about them! 

The success of the OMies will change lives for the better and this is why the OMies were created. Thank you for not only your contribution and support, but for spreading and sharing the OMies among your tribe.

Rick and Dahlia, aka The Omies, are fun, loving, kind, generous, big-hearted people who happen to have an awesome sense of humor to boot. I am honored to be part of their tribe.

The following interview is inspiring, beautiful, funny and honest. Please take a moment and be delighted. Oh, and buy your Omies tee. They are the best ever!

Jennifer Pastiloff: What are you most proud to have manifested in your life?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: My wife.

I actually created a “vision board” for the kind of woman I would like to share my life with. I noted every detail including hair color, personal style, level of grace, unselfishness, interests, etc… I saved all the images and took photos of the board, so people would believe me.

I have told the story to people all over the country to help inspire them. I often think back on how amazing that manifestation process truly was.

The OMies. Tell us about it.

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: The OMies came about from a personal desire to create an image that would best represent the rapidly expanding ZEN GENeration. We affectionately refer to the members of this generation as OMies.

One of the most iconic images of all time, the smiley face, was highly representative of the experiential 1960’s generation. To me, the true beauty in the smiley face design was it’s ultra simplicity. I wanted to create an image that was equally simple, yet highly recognizable and fitting for the attitude of the ZEN GENeration.

I am confident that I achieved this goal with a simple blue circle and 3 straight lines.

With that said, I created my first collection of merchandise almost 6 years ago and was unable to connect with my intended audience. The problem as it turned out, thanks to the insight of a creative mentor of mine – Jim Benton, creator of Happy Bunny and many other highly successful characters, was that my image was zen, but my messaging was not zen enough. Jim recommended that I focus more on the zen category and as he said – “own it”. It was at this point I made the decision to add the meditative/yoga influenced OMie body.

My next adjustment was eliminating all the different colored OMies and going with the most popular color, blue. The final piece of the puzzle fell beautifully into place as my wife and I had always talked about building a brand/company that had true purpose and could really make a difference in people’s lives. This is why 11% of all OMies sales goes to helping families deal with stress and isolation that autism can create. We are a family that deals with this stress and isolation everyday (our twin boys have been diagnosed with autism). Each month, our non-profit organization – blue community, spotlights a family to help.

This is how we describe the OMies on our website:

The OMies represent the ever growing, ever glowing ZEN GENeration. A peaceful, but powerful tribe of individuals who understand that love unites, inspires and rewards. OMies encourage authenticity and integrity as essential components of life.

The OMies are a high-vibe, zen tribe who spread the power of cOMmUNITY everyday, everywhere.


Jennifer Pastiloff: A mantra I live by is “I do what I love and I love what I do.” What would one of the “OMies” mantras be?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Celebrate your uniqueness.

Jennifer Pastiloff: I love that a portion of your sales goes to helping families deal with the challenges of autism. How did this come about?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Our 6 year old twin boys were both diagnosed with autism in 2008. As a result, we have dealt with the stress and isolation that autism can bring every day. My wife and I would often share our frustrations about autism with each other and agreed that it would be so rewarding to be able to help people like us. This was what is known as the “aha” moment.


Jennifer Pastiloff: Who/what inspires you the most?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: My wife – best attitude ever.

My mom – most consistent ever.

My dad – best hall of fame hockey player ever.

My kids – brightest lights ever.


YOU, Jennifer Pastiloff, who connects and promotes people with your heart, not your ego!!!


Jennifer Pastiloff: What is the greatest lesson you have learned from your children?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Be uninhibited.

Act silly.

No detail is small.

*Gifts come in all kinds of packages.


Jennifer Pastiloff: From starting the OMies company?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies: *Work equals play, when you are doing what you love.

Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Never, never, never give up.

Jennifer Pastiloff: From being married?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: 2 people working together can accomplish anything they choose.

Love wins.

Apologizing is not a weakness.

Jennifer Pastiloff: From autism?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: 



**What seems to be different is just different, not worse. If autism is looked at from a different POV, one that sees the “frequency” of these individuals, you “see” the positive gifts and the abundance of these highly-intelligent, unique and amazing kids/people. They carry a vibrant light that cannot be dismayed.

Jennifer Pastiloff: Who has been your greatest teacher?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies: 

1.The Pioneer.

I am fascinated with stories of Pioneers in a wide variety of industries. I am constantly consuming great stories about great ideas that came about from great effort.

2. Failure.

Failure has taught me so many lessons, the most important being – don’t be afraid to fail!!!

3. My wife.

She had a challenging childhood, survived a near death experience at 13, and has spent her entire life helping other people. She teaches me everyday how to be a better person and reminds me that it IS much better to give, than to receive.

Jennifer Pastiloff:  Facebook. I love what you post. How has social media played a part in your life and your career?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Facebook gives me a platform to show the extent of my creativity. I love photography, design, art and inspiring people. Facebook is a tremendous resource for showing one’s creativity.

Social media plays a major role in the success of sharing the OMies all over the world. It is so exciting when someone likes a new image/post, likes the OMies page and places an order, as a result of social media.

Jennifer Pastiloff: My sister Rachel, whose one son has Prader Willi Syndrome asked me to ask the following: How does one continue to manifest your dreams while being a parent?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: You have to be MORE organized, and live life more simply. Remove the clutter from your world (everything that “gets in the way” of you focusing/visualizing on your kids and your dreams). You must dream BIGGER and manifest by TRUSTING in the Universe. With faith and trust, the Universe will BRING you what you need, exactly when you need it. And it’ll be beyond your wildest imagination; even better!

Include ALL of who you authentically are into your dreams; it’s all there for a reason and it serves a purpose. Be proud of who you are already! Gratitude is soooo important.

One of our BIG dreams is the OMies becoming a successful family business that all of our children can work with and around our entire lives; it’s a passion and not just a job! We love to help others. This fuels the manifesting engines.

Jennifer Pastiloff: Do you practice yoga?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: I meditate almost every single day, so I have my own “Yoga” which means, “Union with the Divine.” But I am developing a more consistent yoga routine that includes Hatha flow along with Yoga Nidra (prajna).

Jennifer Pastiloff: Gratitude is the greatest force In my life. Most of my classes are set to this theme. If you could say thank you right now, who would it be to?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: GOD.

My wife.

My mom.

My dad.

My kids.

Every single OMies supporter.

Every special needs parent.

Every teacher.




Jennifer Pastiloff:  When is the last time you have laughed at yourself?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Last week.

I was out sticking OMies stickers all across town acting like a teenager and laughed at my behavior and how impossible growing up has been for me.

Jennifer Pastiloff: Which is your favorite OMie?

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: RIGHT OM.

This design was inspired by Russell Simmons and his passion for yoga, meditation, fashion, etc… but it also has a bit of me in it, as I wear a black cap backwards on most days.

GIDDY OM is a very, very close second.

This design makes me and so many other people smile. It’s a classic!



Jennifer Pastiloff: Who would be your dream team of OMies ? Who would you love to see the OMies shirt on?


Spencer Paysinger #55 NY Giants and Jen Pastiloff wear their Omies tees.

Rick Rondeau of The Omies: Spencer Paysinger (#55 NY Giants) – done

Laura Donnelly (Actress / ABC Missing) – done

Nate Connolly (Lead Guitarist Snow Patrol) – done

Dr. Wayne Dyer & family – almost done?

Oprah – soon! (fingers crossed)

Christy Turlington – soon! (fingers crossed)

*Russell Simmons, Madonna, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jennifer Anniston, Sting, Brad Pitt and his entire brood, Sandra Bullock and little Louis, Alec Baldwin + Hilaria Thomas, & Matthew McConaughey, Jessica Biel + Justin Timberlake….my list goes on and on but these would be some REALLY fun high-vibe OMies.

** all the above mentioned “done” OMies were thanks to Jennifer Pastiloff!!!

What it's all about!

Jennifer Pastiloff:  What’s up next for the OMies?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies: 


More exposure!!!

We are deciding which events, festivals, trade shows, etc.. across the country are best exposure opportunities for the OMies.


Expand the OMies wholesale business (yoga studios, catalogs and retailers).


Expand the collection to include embroidered caps, shirts, hoodies and kids wear.


We are looking to develop some product license partnerships in select categories, including:


Toy figurines

Plush toys



Yoga gear

Phone case

Phone app



Jennifer Pastiloff: Where can we find more OMies? How do we order shirts?


Rick Rondeau of The Omies:

and our private and brand new organization that donates to Autism (

THANK you!!! xoxoxoxox :))))))

 Follow the Omies on Facebook

Follow the Omies on Twitter