Forgiveness, Guest Posts

The Orchid of Forgiveness.

November 7, 2012

The Orchid of Forgiveness by Nancy Alder

This morning I walked into one of my bathrooms ready to throw out an orchid that I thought was done.  I had forgotten to water it for weeks.  I had forgotten to open the window and give it more light.  I had forgotten this orchid.

But there it was in the window with not one but two new bloom stalks that had show up virtually overnight.  This fighter, this beautiful and simple warrior had decided to bloom again despite my lack of care.

I realized that the orchid had forgiven me.

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”


We need to learn to be more like orchids and allow ourselves to forgive and grow.  That does not mean to not be angry, do not fight and do not express your displeasure with a situation or a person.  Just simply, do not hold on to those things and let them cause you to wither.  Acknowledge your feelings, create a space for them and then let them go.

My yoga practice is a place where I am able to practice forgiveness.  Life gets in the way of every asana, vinyasa and Bakasana I would love to do on more occasions than I care to admit.  Yet when I return to the mat I find my practice is waiting to fit with where I am at that moment.  Is there resistance?  You bet!  But there is also space for growth and exploration.   I am able to forgive myself for not making time, for putting others first and for letting things get in my way.  I explore new places to find forgiveness towards others, to experience my feelings and to then let them go.

I find a way to stretch, release, and grow just like the orchid had done in my neglect.

“To err is human.  To forgive is divine.” –Alexander Pope

As I write this I think of my friend who forgave me when I did not acknowledge the importance of a special milestone in her life.  I think of the way my elves still love me even when my mean mommy side comes out too frequently.  I think of the how my husband moves heaven and Earth to allow me to do trainings when it causes stress on his schedule.  I think of how much forgiveness I have been given and how it is time to give back.

To those who have hurt me and from whom I have received silence, anger and vitriol, I forgive you.  To the ones who forget to email, call or visit, I know it was not personal.  To those I have unfriended, to those I have cut out and to those whom I have never let in, my door is open for you.

It is time for us all to move on to a place of blooming and growth.  It is time for us to be like my orchid.

I am not perfect but I am strong.  I know neglect is not a sign of hatred or dislike, but rather that love is still there waiting to show itself again.  I know my yoga practice will give me space to forgive myself and my heart has space to forgive others.

I am thankful to my little purple orchid for reminding me how important it is to forgive.  I gave it water this morning and opened the window.  I will remember more often to take care of it and take care of myself.  I will remember to let go and forgive.

How can you allow yourself to bloom and grow?  What or whom can you forgive?

Nancy Alder is a 200H EYRT  in Connecticut. She teaches her students to connect with space and breath from a place of safety and humor. She writes for many yoga blogs and chronicles her daily practice to find yoga in all places on her own blog, Flying Yogini. She is co-founder of Teachasana, a site by yoga teachers for yoga teachers. When not writing or doing yoga she is in awe of her elves, busting asanas in crazy places and counting the days until the next snowfall.

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  • Reply Julie Valbuena November 7, 2012 at 9:01 am

    Hey, Jen. So happy to see all the fun things that are going on in your life!
    Just a quick follow up. I had sent you an email a few days (or weeks!) ago. I want to pay you do the tshirt I got at your workshop at the Green Monkey in Miami Beach in October. I’d hate to not pay you!!! Please send a Paypal bill or even just give me an account number or address where I can deposit or send a check to!
    Thanks! Have a blessed day.

    Sent from my iPhone

  • Reply Willow (Paige Pellegrino) November 7, 2012 at 10:27 am

    My dear godfather told me the two most important things in life are love and forgiveness. Sometimes it’s hard, but I have made a vow to let these two things be my label. It’s what I strive to be made of. PS. Delicate cycle please.
    <3 xoxo

  • Reply Liz Tyburczy November 7, 2012 at 10:58 am

    Nancy thanks so much for sharing we all need to be reminded to allow forgiveness into our heart not only for others but ourself. I am looking forward to my new ways to bloom

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  • Reply joshbecker246538350 November 7, 2012 at 12:34 pm

    Great post Nancy! I love seeing others that really “get” forgiveness. That forgiveness is something you GET to do not something you have to do!

    After all, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. It frees up that space we otherwise carry discontent and resentment in. It frees up that space to love ourselves and love others. Forgiveness literally has nothing to do with the person who has harmed you and everything to do with allowing you to become the fullest and biggest expression of yourself!

    Thank you for sharing!


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  • Reply Sharon Cormier November 11, 2012 at 5:33 am

    This says it all. Beautiful symbol of orchid….beautiful writing. Thanks, Nancy.

  • Reply cloudy with a chance of sarai November 12, 2012 at 8:59 pm

    ‘I know neglect is not a sign of hatred or dislike, but rather that love is still there waiting to show itself again.’—-Thank you for this Nancy. Thank you for this jolt of eloquent perspective that I so desperately needed.

  • Reply Flying Yogini (@FlyingYogini) November 17, 2012 at 10:15 am

    Thanks everyone for the comments and taking time to read my post! xo

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