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Don’t Feed The Monkeys! Stop Giving Away Your Power. Video Blog.

May 6, 2013

Tribe, this one is near and dear to me. I am a work in progress, as we all are, right? Love you guys. Let’s stop feeding the monkeys together!


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  • Reply Amanda May 6, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    Holy Woman of Wisdom,

    You fill my heart and mind with monkey ideas to think about. I sit here in my office – a place I stay away from as much as possible!

    How am I giving the part of me that I don’t want to give away? The biggest place is to the worry about what I have done wrong at work – what could get me fired. This takes away joy, energy, peace.

    I fed the monkey’s all weekend and couldn’t sleep. Yesterday, I read some very wise words and took them in. I meditated on them during my run/walk with my son and later with my yoga and meditation. They found their way deep into my heart.

    Then…then…then…I slept the deepest most wonderful sleep. And – a part of my worry that I chose to give myself away with was for nothing. I declare I am finished! I will no longer feed the monkey’s of my insecurity. I will let them find their lunch elsewhere. Maybe with my son. He can feed them without giving up himself. He’s three what a beautiful place to be.

    And…..I will stop. I will commit. I will find other ways to do things like hemp protein and nuts and other things. No more milk – even if it’s goat milk. No more! No more staying in bed when I am no longer sleeping. No more!

    I love you!


  • Reply Susie May 6, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    It amazes me how after many periods of peace, the monkeys can still be hungry! I do think it helps to not go down the path where the monkeys are hanging out. I can sense it as it starts to happen, there is a fork in the road…take the sunny path of warmth and light or the monkey path to feed the monkeys. Even though monkeys are VERY cute, it sometimes takes every bit of strength I can muster to go towards the warmth and light. Very odd when you think about it, because who wouldn’t prefer the sunnier path? It’s the animal lover in us, that must be it. But each time the choice presents itself, I can feel myself getting stronger in resisting the temptation to feed those monkeys!

    Great post, thanks Jen.

  • Reply Denise Bruso May 6, 2013 at 4:34 pm

    This came to me today via a friend that fits perfectly with your video blog today…”FREE YOURSELF FROM NEGATIVE PEOPLE:…Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven and like minded. Relationships should help you, not hurt you. Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be. Choose friends who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you – people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. When you free yourself from negative people you free yourself to be YOU -and being YOU is the only way to truly live.”… ~Jeff Caughren~…I thank you from my heart for just ‘BEING’ you…Your words and spirit have helped me more than you will ever know…I wish you light, love and the energy to continue doing what you do that inspires so many (again in ways you may never know)…From my heart to yours I send you love, understanding and most of all peace of mind coupled with joy of heart….<3

  • Reply Kelly Yepsen May 6, 2013 at 6:14 pm

    You rock my world with every post! No you can’t make everyone happy and every essay can’t speak to every person. But you are one of the most authentic person I have ever met. I know that you live your writing. This was so on time for me. Sometimes the monkeys are your own thoughts and doubt. For me it’s stop feeding into the I can’t and DO IT!!

  • Reply Shaylah May 6, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    Dear Jen,
    I love your video blogs. Keep up the good work. Here is something else I am working on. Before I will spend too much time with something because of religious reasons of doing God’s work. It is nothing wrong doing good things but when those “good” things start to drain you then it becomes a job or something else to rob you of your time.
    So what I do is share the information and then keep it moving because as the saying you can lead the horse to water but you can’t make them drink. I tell you and keep it moving so I can continue with my life and have the energy to do what makes me happy.
    Like you said” don’t let them steal your happy!

  • Reply Todd Lohenry May 7, 2013 at 12:15 pm

    Hey, Jen! Your post reminded me of a poem about monkeys. Sometimes, you need to remember to thank them, too… https://toddlohenry.com/2013/03/31/thanking-the-monkey/

  • Reply Todd Lohenry May 7, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    Reblogged this on Wholeheartedness and commented:
    Yea! Another Jen Pastiloff vlog…

  • Reply Joel May 7, 2013 at 1:10 pm

    So very true. I suppose at heart it’s about our social nature. Of course we care about the results of our interactions with other human beings. Even the choice to look into someone’s eyes can end up being a plus or minus, can’t it? But “giving away your power,” yes, that’s another thing. How much we concern ourselves with the opinions and support or lack thereof can be a tricky thing to juggle. Thanks for the reminder that giving too much power to another can ultimately be a net loss for myself and everyone else within my sphere of influence.

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