It’s worse than you think… they’re not thinking of you at all…
I asked this recently on social media: Do you equate your business with worthiness? Do you find the need to tell people how busy you are? Do you feel “less than” if you aren’t busy? Post honestly. Curious about this phenomenon.
I get caught up doing it at times: The I’m so busy track, and how on some level I think it makes me more relevant. The responses from people were honest and frank. Many people said that they did equate being busy with self-worth, but many didn’t. Some said they had learned a lesson recently, having just ended up in the hospital or gotten fired and finding themselves suddenly very un-busy.
I read all of the comments and something struck me. Something I’ve been thinking about a lot. We think a lot about the they.
Them. Others.
We think a lot about what they/them/others will think of us.
Most of the time it isn’t what they think. It’s what we think they’re going to think.
We need to stop thinking about what we think others may think and just do/write/be/go/not go.
Whatever it is, don’t let what you think you know about what others think stop you.
Besides, someone once said to me, “It’s worse than you think. They’re not thinking about you at all.”
So there’s that.
Someone’s always going to have something to say.
Do, or don’t do it anyway.
Know what you know.
And what you don’t know, what we all don’t know, is as big as the sky. It’s a world of We-Just-Don’t-Know out there. What others will think is the most overused, tired, put it to bed already, who gives a flying rat’s ass, enough already reason for making choices, whether they are conscious ones or not.
What I’m saying is: liberate yourself. Let us all do that.
It’s time.
And remember the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others thought of you when you realize how seldom they actually do.”
So there’s that. And dare to be a dork. Watch my video above. You can bet your bottom dollar I am.
Yea, I said bet your bottom dollar.
Jennifer Pastiloff is part of the faculty in 2015 at Other Voices Querétaro in Mexico with Gina Frangello, Emily Rapp, Stacy Berlein, and Rob Roberge. Please email Gina Frangello to be accepted at ovbooks@gmail.com. Click poster for info or to book. Space is very limited.
5 spots left for The New Years retreat to Ojai. Email info@jenniferpastiloff.com.
hahah yes…or they are thinking what we might be thinking about them <3 So true…so tired of it..who are they anyway..just our ego, our fears of looking stupid.
You dont look like dork at all..truly.. I appreciate your honesty in a repressed world…